Tris' Suicide
by Booklover1367
Summary: I don't remember much. I remember jumping, taping my note to the rail of the pit, remember waking up, seeing the dauntless guard on the other side of the fence, buildings in the distance. I remember running. That was all. Tris jumps into the chasm and miraculously lives somehow. Why and how, read to find out. Rated T for language and content. Sadly, my name is not Veronica Roth.
1. The Jump

Three o'clock in the morning. I kept the outfit simple, but something that covered my identity. Sweatpants, tee, sweatshirt, combat boots, all black. It was hard not to cry, but I couldn't stop the tears.

I looked down at Tobias on the bed, and whispered, "I love you." Before closing the door and locking it, leaving the keys in front of the door to his apartment. The roll of tape and my note to Tobias was secure in my pocket when I reached my hand in. Tears streamed from my eyes but I could care less. I needed to do this. I was divergent. I was a unique divergent, three different factions, instead of two. I didn't fit in Dauntless. I didn't fit anywhere. I had come first, but that was skills, it didn't have anything to do with _me_. My personality didn't help me with that win at all.

Images of Al flashed across my vision. He didn't deserve to die. I had killed him, my best friend.

I got out the roll of tape, and my note to Tobias, reading it over once more:

_Dear Four,_

_ I would call you your real name, but I won't, because I'm sure you won't be the only one to read this letter. I love you so much, and my doings are not because of you. I love you, I could never leave you, but I am Divergent, and I just can't fit into Dauntless. There, I said it. Al is dead, and I can't let that sit on my shoulders along with my Divergence. Find someone else, Four. There are tons of Dauntless girls in love with you. I'm sure at least one of them is great. Live your life Tobias, I don't need to be in it. _

_ Lots of love,_

_ Tris_

I cry, and several tears land on the letter, so I quickly tape it to the railing. After several words of encouragement to myself, I am standing on the railing, over the note. _You are strong Tris._ I hear Tobias say over and over in my mind. Yes, I am strong, and I can do this. I take my last breath, and fall forward. Good luck Tobias, and then the cold waves engulf me.


	2. She's Gone

I don't remember much. I remember taping the note for Tobias to the railing, remember jumping, and wishing him good luck before I hit the water. That cold water, that made me regret my decision when I hit it.

I remember waking up, in a field, standing and seeing the Dauntless guard on the other side of the fence, staring at me, and city lights in the distance past the guard. I remember running. That was it. Eventually I slowed down and put together my surroundings. Forest. Birds chirping. I was not in the city anymore. Sitting on a log, I realized what was happening. I wasn't in the city, not inside the fence. I was outside it. Running in the direction I think I can from got me nowhere. I was trapped, or more likely, an unwanted freeness. Panic seized me and I shrieked, running as fast as I could, trying to make a sense of the forest, to get back to the field, to scream at the guard that I needed help, but I was apparently going to do anything but that.

Why hadn't I died? Was this death? The amount of possibilities and questions in my head were endless.

After running around for a while I settled down on the ground and tried to think.

_Climb a tree._

Of course. I scrambled to my feet and up the first climbable tree I saw, wrapping my legs around it and bear gripping up.

Nothing. For miles. Just tree tops, not even a clearing.

I wanted to go mad, and fell halfway down the tree, screaming in pain. It wasn't fair. The world couldn't do this to me, I was Tris, and I shouldn't be here. Tris would be able to at least distantly see the city, Tris couldn't have ran so far that it came out of view. I sobbed on the ground, ripping up moss and throwing it from me. Anywhere but me. I screamed on and on, for what time I couldn't tell.

CHRISTINA

"_She's gone."_

That's all I heard come from Tobias' mouth. Over and over across my apartment. I didn't even realize what was happening. When I finally sat up in bed, tears were going down his face and his hands were all up in his hair. He wore pants, but was shirtless, and looked like he had gotten up seconds ago. How had he gotten in? I looked over to the door, and the wood on the edge of it was splintered. He broke in. Of course. Suddenly I felt hands on both my shoulders and whipped around to find Tobias' staring into my eyes. I screamed, shoving him back. "Tobias! What the fuck? You broke my door!" I regretted my words as soon as they were out of my mouth. He looked broken. "Where is she?" His voice was desperate and tired. "Who?" I asked. What on earth was he talking about? Maybe he needed to go to the infirmary. "Tris! Christina she's gone. There's no way she went to work this early in the morning. It's not even a day she works!" He sounded even more desperate with every word. "Relax Tobias and go put a shirt on." I told him, climbing out of bed. "Tris most likely ended up heading to a lingerie shop or something this morning before you woke so she wouldn't have to tell you." Tobias wasn't taking it though. "Christina of all people you really think _Tris_ would do that?" He asked me, and I couldn't stand the desperation in his face anymore.

"Alright, alright, give me a minute and get out so I can get dressed and Ill help you-" I was cut off but Uriah storming in, only glancing at my broken door. "You guys might wanna head to the pit." He said, keeling over and panting heavily. I gave one look at Tobias before grabbing my sweatshirt and pulling it over my head as I ran to the pit with Tobias, leaving an exhausted Uriah in my apartment. A huge crowd was gathered on one side of the pit, and Tobias ran ahead of me, shoving through the crowd as fast as he could, and I followed him as closely as possible. He was agitated, and in instructor mode, which meant no one was going to be messing around with him until he found Tris. It couldn't be more clearer then that. Some people shrunk back, some stared at him since he was still shirtless, and others completely ignored him. When we reached the front of the crowd I surveyed the scene. Nothing, except a note taped to the railing and a tape dispenser on its side on the ground. Tobias practically lunged at the note and I tapped my feet together, waiting for Tobias to finish reading it. Where on earth was Tris? A knot caught in my throat, and I shakily made my way to the railing. It couldn't be. Why? But as I looked over the rail, I saw nothing, just waves crashing over the boulders. Good, but who was it? Where in the compound was Tris?

Suddenly, Tobias shredded the note and lunged to the ledge to look over. A mix of sadness and confusion was planted on his face. "The note?" I ask him, but he looks down. "Where's the body?" He says gruffly, and I back up a step. He might throw a punch at anyone any second, and I don't want it to be me with a broken nose. "Four there is no body. There's no way they already fished out a body and took it away." I encourage him, rubbing his back. "Now go put a shirt on before girls topple you over and calm yourself. I'll see what I can do." He stands straight and walks off, muttering words I cannot hear.

I don't know what to do. Look for a body that I'm certain isn't there? Look for Tris in invisible places I haven't heard of? She would show up eventually, she had to. I didn't even know if the note was from Tris or not, let alone what it was about. I started by looking for Eric, even though I'd much rather talk to Max, Eric was probably less busy and easier to find.

True. I found Eric after five minutes of searching. He was in the pit, yelling at some kid about something I could care less about. "Eric was there a body?" He whipped around to face me. "Whatdya want?" He said gruffly. I roll my eyes. "I _asked you_ if there was a body. You know, was it a suicide?" I ask, folding my arms across my chest. After Tobias had left me in the pit, I had gone back to my apartment to dress, and wore a short tight strapless top that revealed my belly button and dark skinny jeans addressed well by riding boots.

"No one knows. No body, and we let Four read the note first since it was addressed to him and he shredded it beyond piecing together. If you want information, ask him, because the only info we got is that note and he was the only one to read it, besides the writer." He chuckled, and turned back to the kid to scream at him more. I sighed and headed to Tobias' apartment. There was no way this was going well.

TRIS

I don't know how long I screamed on the ground. I had to get my act together. Live in the moment, and in this moment, I was in a forest, and I would have to deal with it.

I started by walking, looking for something, anything. A sign of life, something to eat, some sort of shelter. Judging by the sky it would be night soon, and I needed to make it through the night. I t was obvious that I would be in this weird forest for at least one night, so I needed food, and a tree to sleep in. That would be good enough for now.

I managed out of luck to find a wild raspberry bush, and even though they weren't the ripest, I went for it. When I was sure that the bush was clean of berries, I continued walking until the mosquitoes came out, and then I clambered up a tree with a y in the branches, and I settled down, hoodie pulled over face, to sleep.


	3. Amity and the letter

CHRISTINA

When I arrived at Tobias' apartment, I found the door cracked open, and when I peeked my head through the door, no one was there. "Tobias?" I asked, stepping into the room. I headed to the bathroom and knocked on the door. "Tobias? You in there?" I asked into the door.

"What?" I hear behind me and I scream and whip around. Tobias stood in front of me, holding a sheet of paper in his hand. "God Tobias you scared me." I say, going around him and sitting on the edge of the bed. His eyes were red. He had been crying. "Sorry I ran over to Uriah's to...get something." Tobias mutters and sets the paper on the dresser. "Anything?" I purse my lips. "Nothing Tobias. I don't even know what I'm looking for Tobias. What the hell was on the note?" I ask him, trying to be careful with my words. "It was a suicide note." He says, and sits in a chair in the corner of the room. "From who?" I whisper softly, trying to be sensitive, even though I could have interrogated him with a gun to his head at this point.

"Tris." He says, putting his head in his hands. My whole body melts, and after that, it turns into a roaring fire. He had to be lying. We couldn't seriously be talking about Tris, could we? Even though everything I knew pointed to her, the idea crushed me. "There's no body, Tobias. Tris can't be gone. She's better than that, and she was perfectly fine." I say, trying to convince both Tobias _and_ myself that she was alive. Tobias looked up at me. "Try explaining that to her letter about Al and her…divergence." He says, practically whispering the last word. Divergence? What on earth? "Uh Tobias? Do you need a doc? What the fuck is divergence?" I say, with no clue about anything. Maybe he needed a doctor… but he answers, "Divergence is when your aptitude results are more than one faction. To be Divergent, it's dangerous. Divergent people can manipulate the simulations, for example, one fear Tris went through was trapped in a glass container, slowly filling with water, and she broke the glass." He explains, and I take a minute to process what he said. Divergent? Simulation manipulation? I understood it, but it was sort of a lot to take in. "Ok…but Tobias there is no body. Do you think she, you know, did it some other way?" I ask, trying to avoid the mention of death. "Christina I'm so lost. I have no idea. The only thing I could guess is that she somehow, didn't die, just, left." He replies getting up and walking to the door. He wants me to leave, and I stand. "Tobias I'm confused too, but what could have happened? Kidnapping? There's really no explanation." I tell him and pass him through the doorway and turn to face him. He leans against the doorway, sighing. "Thank you Christina, and I'm sorry for dragging you into this, goodbye." And with that, he closed the door, leaving me in the hall of the Dauntless. Sorry for dragging you into this? Who did he think he was? It was late, and I needed rest, but how could I let this sit? She might have been his girlfriend, but she was also my girlfriend, in a different way. I needed sleep, and Tobias did too. Maybe after a night's rest I could argue with him more. That's exactly what I needed, so I walked down the hall to my dorm, each step feeling more drowsy than the step before.

TRIS

When I wake up, I murmur Tobias' name, until I realize, I am not with him, and I am not in the Dauntless compound, let alone his apartment. I am somehow in a forest, and it takes me a minute to breathe properly, calmly is a whole other story.

Judging by the sky, it was about seven, or if there even was time where I was. _No._ I thought. That would be to an extreme level.

I start by walking again, looking for something, just anything to live off of. It seemed though to just be miles of forest. I didn't even come across a single animal. Everything was, or seemed, placed. Which wouldn't really be a surprise if I was dead, but I felt alive. When I fell halfway down the tree yesterday, it hurt. I couldn't get hurt if I was dead, right? I shook my head and walked a little faster, but froze.

_Water._

I had gotten so used to the sound of the pit's waves that the sound was like heaven to me. I ran, trying to follow the trickling sound of water, but as I got closer, and the sound got louder, it seemed to be more like the pit rather than a stream. Was it a waterfall? I couldn't be sure, but _any_ water was one, a resource, but also a chance at life. I sprinted through the forest and felt so…_joyful_. I was in a forest, confused at my surroundings, but something inside me wanted the sound of water _to be_ the pit, and even though I knew it wasn't true, I let that glimmer of hope go as wild as it wanted, since otherwise I'd most likely be crying on my way to the water. I laughed at that. Did I have a microscopic Amity side? I couldn't be sure, since this was definitely not an Abnegation, Dauntless, or even Erudite thing to do, but that small Amity fell when I saw it was nothing but a small waterfall. It worked for me, Amity or not, and I started towards the cool fresh water.

CHRISTINA

When I woke, I quickly got ready for breakfast, in a black tank top, ripped at the knees skinny jeans, and combat boots. Four would _not_ leave me hanging. I was also Tris' friend, and he wasn't the most important person in her world.

When I reached the cafeteria, I headed straight to the table where Four usually sat, with Uriah and Zeke and all of them. Uriah was trying to fit a whole potato in his mouth, and Zeke was bent over, his head on the ground laughing so hard. I slammed my tray on the table and the potato halfway crammed into Uriah's mouth came flying out and right away he started cracking jokes that I tried to block out. "Uriah! Where's Four?" I ask him and he groans. "Christina, learn to joke around. Four asked me for a map of the city last night and he didn't show up this morning. Probably went looking for good capture the flag areas." He starts muttering things I can't hear at the end of his sentence and turns to talk to Marlene. "Shit." I mutter, walking out of the cafeteria, leaving my tray at the table, not a bite out of anything. He left. The bastard walked out. How could he leave me hanging like that? It looked like I was going to be finding Tris on my own, and so far, I didn't have a real good start.


	4. To do list: Murder Jeannine

CHRISTINA

I was walking out of Uriah's apartment, completely pissed. I had asked him for the exact map he had given Four, and he was stubborn. The finale deal I agreed to could have been worse, but I had no idea what I was expecting. He wanted me to play truth or dare, and I agreed to it, because if I didn't I would have to let him and Zeke shoot muffins off my head, at any time they wanted, and I didn't want them doing it drunk, so I went for the game of truth or dare. He never said though it had to be any day soon, so I was leaving as soon as possible.

I went to my apartment first, stuffing a bag with clothes and toiletries all that crap. When I finished I went to the tracks, and got on the train. Only then did I look over the map.

It was huge, took a third of the car's space. I took out a red marker and made a dot where the dauntless compound was. Where could Tris be? Not in dauntless, that was for sure. I didn't even know if she was alive. This was trickier than I thought.

TRIS

I stayed by the fall, but got hungry, and there was nothing but water, and birds, but that seemed desperate, and I had no weapon, let alone the speed for a bird. I sat by the water. Was I desperate? I was desperately angry and annoyed, but would I kill a bird? I continued to think, until a twig snapped behind me. I whipped around, to see an armed man, and next to him, Jeannine. She was smiling, coldly. Every muscle in my body went limp. "Hello Beatrice." She says, and I stand, angry and confusion giving me the energy I need. "My name is _not Beatrice_." I hiss, stepping towards her. "Well, _Beatrice_, looks like you need some help, want it?" She asks calmly. This is infuriating. "What do you want Jeannine?" I ask her, crossing my arms. "What the hell is this?" She laughs, and begins to walk away, the armed man following her. I want to follow her. I should follow her, she expects me to stay, but it could be a trap. She stops and turns around, now ten feet from me. "This is a little game called a _simulation._ You cannot escape it. It is my masterpiece. If you die in the simulation you die in real life. Did you think you were really in a forest outside the city?" She laughs again. "The simulation is only beginning, Tris. Let's see if you can manipulate this one." She says, walking away, and when I try to follow her, I can't. I look down, and see my shoes stinking into the ground. I scream, and Jeannine just continues to walk away. I struggle, but only sink faster. I will die. I will drown in dirt in a simulation. She had to be messing with me; she couldn't have built a simulation like this. It was impossible, especially to make something like this for the divergent.

Three months ago, we stopped Eric from working with Jeannine to kill off the divergent, and somehow they both kept their jobs, even though everyone in the city wants both dead. How could she have gotten away with this?

I hated Jeannine, and when this was over, Tobias' bare hands, and mine would smash her skull in.

I remember when Jeannine put the entire dauntless in a simulation to destroy Abnegation, but Tobias and me, along with a few others stopped the dauntless halfway there. Eric and Jeannine were given a trial, but unluckily, both got through under innocent.

The dirt was up to my hips now, and I scrambled for something to grab onto, but there wasn't even a tree root or patch of grass I could reach. I screamed as loud as I could when the dirt was at my armpits. No one could hear me. It was at my neck and I struggled to keep my arms up. Soon my chin was covered and I tried to tilt my head back, I couldn't let my mouth or nose get covered, but the ground was determined to keep me in the place I already was in. I screamed, until my mouth and nose were covered, and I was submerged. I couldn't breathe. I kicked, but my feet got me no where. I only sunk deeper. Then I heard a sucking noise, and kicked my feet. There was an empty space, and my feet were in it. I wriggled, trying to sink faster, and I did.

I landed in a meadow. Fear shot through me. It was the same meadow in my crow fear.

_**Cliffhanger. Just to let you guys know. Chapter five will be up tomorrow. Going to the beach! :) :)**_


	5. Crows

CHRISTINA

The first place I decided to go to was abnegation, or more precisely, Tris' parent's home. I knew that if she wasn't there, things would be extremely awkward, but it was worth it. If she wasn't there, I would go to Erudite, and try and find her brother.

Even though I should always think faction before blood, Tris didn't always think that way, so I would have to attempt to think like her, which was actually harder than I thought. I felt the train slowing, and I folded up the map, stuffing it in my bag to get ready to jump. I jumped, and immediately started walking to the house. The one advantage I had against Four was that I was calmer, so while he was going to enemies' homes and all that crap, I would be logical Tris. Even though there was a suicide note, it was possible she freaked and went somewhere for comfort, forgetting the note.

I was extremely nervous when I reached her old house. It took me a couple minutes to bring myself to knock. Eventually I did, and a woman who I guessed was Tris' mother greeted me.

"Hello dear, what can I do for you…" She trailed off when she looked at me, a girl wearing all black, with tattoos and that whole shenanigan.

"Hi. I'm Christina, Tris' friend, and…she's missing." I finish, crossing my arms over my chest.

The woman looks me over again, a worried look planted flat across her face. She looks down. "And?"

"Is she here?" I ask, already doubting it. The woman obviously knew nothing about it.

"No. I'm sorry. Please find her." She replied, barely a whisper. She closed the door, leaving me outside. One down, one to go, and I headed back to the tracks. This was torture. Why Tris? What on earth is wrong with you? I was _so_ going to kill her when this was over with.

TRIS

I ran. In this simulation, I could move, and I did. I ran, but I felt claws in my arm, and looking over to my shoulder, as I reluctantly predicted, sat a crow, refusing to move. I reached into the long grass for a gun, but when I brought my hand back I realized what Jeannine said was true. I could not manipulate the simulation.

I headed to the forest, but my feet slowed, and the forest got further away, my body automatically cursing the day that Jeannine was born. Would she seriously kill me this fast? I grinned. I had an idea, even though it was a long shot. I saw the flock of crows, but I ignored them and looked to the artificial sky. I hoped she could hear me.

"HEY JEANNINE! YOU SURE YOU WANNA KILL ME THIS FAST?!" I screamed, but nothing happened. Come on, she had to hear me.

"I STILL HAVE FIVE FEARS LEFT!" I screamed, but again, nothing happened, and I shrieked, covering my face when the crows got to me.

Pain. It was more real than any simulation I had ever experienced, but yet the crows didn't dig deep. There was blood, and it stung all over, but they didn't do more than that. I curled into a ball in the meadow, shielding my so far unscratched face and as much as I could. Eventually, they stopped, and I looked up to see them flying away. It must have worked, either that, or Jeannine was planning something I didn't know about, which was usually the case. I tried to sit up, but the ground was quicksand, again, and when I fall through it, I am in a glass tank.

CHRISTINA

When I reached the Erudite compound, I felt everyone's eyes burning into my skin. It was embarrassing, and reputation ruining, so I hurried inside. The woman at the front desk looked up, a face that told me, _what the hell do you of all people want?_ I ignored it.

"Uh, hi. I'm looking for Caleb Prior?" I ask, crossing my arms over my chest, keeping a full attitude.

The woman looked down to her computer and started typing something. She muttered, "He's busy."

I sighed, and the woman looked up. I loved coming from Candor. She was a terrible liar. "Well I guess he wouldn't care anyway that his sister is missing…he has an attitude, very over protective you know." I say, smirking as I turn to leave.

The woman grunted. "I'll call him down, just take a seat…and don't break anything." She snapped, and I grinned, heading for a spinney chair. I spun wildly, the woman's face belonging in a priceless museum. "Where is she?" I hear a voice say, and I turn to see a guy who must be Caleb.

"Hey Caleb." I say, and he gives me a look of confusion.

"You are…?"

"A friend of Tris'. She's missing. Is she here?" I ask, and his face goes into shock.

"Tris is gone? What if something happens to her? Is she ok?" He throws a wave of questions I feel too lazy to answer but I know I have to.

"Chill out. There was a suicidal note, but no body where there should have been one. We're looking for her. Any ideas?" I ask him, but he sits down and puts his head in his hands. His face looked torn.

"I have no idea." He mutters, and I put myself into shock. Are my senses all jacked, or was he really _lying?_ I could tell for sure, but I didn't really want him to be lying. Eventually I say, "Caleb. I'm from Candor. You're lying, may I ask why?" And he stands.

"Look I have to get going-" but I cut him off. "You don't have to go anywhere. You know where she is."

He looks at me, fear written in red marker all over his Erudite face. He turns to go, but I step forward and grab him.

"Caleb I ain't playing around-" but I am cut off rudely by a sharp woman's voice. "Christina, will you please let Caleb go? He has important business to attend to."

I let go, and turn to her. The woman plastered all over the news, the woman who betrayed the city and is still in control. "Jeannine." I say, letting go of Caleb's arm and turning to face her.

"Please come with me." She says, before I can ask about Tris, or anything else. I follow her, down hallways, up stairs, until we are in a bright hallway that looks as if a single soul hasn't passed down it in years. She stops, and grabs my arm.

"What?" I say, but a needle in my arm that she must have hidden in her fist pinches my voice out. "You have no need to worry about your friend." She whispers as I sink to the ground. I see black spots flying across my vision, and I try to scream, but I am voiceless. I see darkness, and only get out one name, Tris.


	6. Water and Fire

CHRISTINA

I woke up in a small empty room. I groaned, sitting up and facing the door. How could I have been so stupid? Of course Jeannine was behind Tris' mysterious disappearance. Jeannine wanted Tris dead, or alive, I didn't know, and she got what she wanted. I banged on the door, even though I knew it was going to do nothing, until they decided to do something with me. I shivered at the thought of what they would do to me. Kill me? Do tests on me? The possibilities were endless.

When I gave up on banging, I took a step back a screamed, no words in particular. After that attempt, I sat on the floor and waited, since there wasn't much else to do.

I think I fell asleep again; the drug Jeannine gave me pulling me in and out of consciousness. Every time I woke up in the room, until about the fifth time, I woke up in a chair, my hands in handcuffs.

I scowled. I was in an interrogation room. This would be fun. I leaned back into the seat and stared across at my interrogator, a woman in her sixties who looked like the type of extremely annoying people.

"Well?" I ask her, and she sighs, looking down at the paper that I wanted to see so badly.

"Miss Christina, please tell me, why are you in the Erudite compound?" Her voice is flat and dull; this will be dragged on forever, I can already tell.

"I'm looking for my best friend, Tris." I say, imitating the woman's voice, earning a glare, in which I only responded to with a smirk.

"Miss Christina please cooperate. Tell the truth." And then I realize where this is going, and it's nowhere fun. I sit forward and lean across the table.

"Listen bitch. I ain't playing this game. I'm telling the truth, and from the looks of it, you're from Candor, so back off my ass and learn that I'm telling the truth." I say, and when the words are out of my mouth I sit back, and the woman snarls before getting up and leaving me in the room. I always win.

TRIS

I know what's coming next, or at least I think I do. The tank starts filling, but when I look around, it's black outside the tank, which is different than my original fear.

Three minutes go by and it's up to my knees. I'm not sure if it will reach my head or not, so I'm not entirely scared. I didn't die in my first fear, so why would I now? That's when I realize that I'm still bleeding. The cuts are minor, but they are there, and the water is slightly tinted pink. Great. Now I am standing in water and my own blood.

Eventually the water reaches my chest, and I try to breathe calmly, since freaking out will not help me. It goes faster, and then I take my last breath before my head is submerged. I bang on the glass, but realize I cannot manipulate this stupid simulation. I struggle for a breath, and then the water level lowers, and I gasp to the top for air, finding though my foot is caught in the melting bottom of the tank, and the water is seeping through it. I let myself sink, my lungs still burning, until I fall in the ocean, my next fear. I already struggled to breathe, and yet I was drowning again. I wished my fears were in a different order. This fear passed quicker though, and when I fell through the ocean floor I was about to pass out. When I fall, I land on a pile of sticks and logs, or more precisely, a small mountain of them. Ropes snake around my body and pull me to a stake, and then I know what is coming. People stand around me, and I see the people I know holding torches, Christina, Eric, Will, Al, Peter, Zeke, Uriah, Marlene, so on, and then my heart stops at the last person, who happens to be Tobias. They all step forward simultaneously and drop their torches onto the mound of wood.

The fire spreads and begins to creep towards me. How will my body withstand everything? And then when I think longer, I realize that it's not supposed to. I will end up with burns over my scratches, and smoke in the lungs that had just been filled with water.

The fire ignites my skin and I shriek in pain as the flames cover my body. Then, after a three second burst, the flames stop, and I fall through the floor as I did every other time, but my body is in pain, and before I can react to my abnegation room and the mirrored walls, I drop to the floor, blackness sliding across my vision.


	7. It'll all come to an end soon

TRIS

The pain is unbearable. I wake up, but I am no longer in my abnegation room, which means I must have passed through, unconscious. Now I stand, somehow without falling over, a gun to my head, and a gun in my hand, my family standing in a line in front of me. I am weak though, and it hurts to lift my arm, so I lean my head against the gun, feeling fake Jeannine's breath on the back of my neck. I do not tell her to pull the trigger though, because I remember; if I die in the simulation, I die in real life.

I want to scream. This sucks, so I bite my lip, close my eyes, and picture my family members as Eric, Jeannine, and Peter.

I pull the trigger, three times, at my enemies, keeping my eyes closed. When I open them, I see my family members dead, so I turn away as my feet sink into the ground. When I finish sinking, I finally open my eyes, to find myself in the forest where Jeannine left me to go through my fears.

I get the game now. I am wounded, am injured, and now I shall slowly die in a forest. Fuck Jeannine.

CHRISTINA

I am led back to my cell by a guard. This is going nowhere. Fuck Jeannine's shitting life. On the way I try to memorize the way I'm going, but it's one big mess of hallways that all look the same. It was only thirty seconds into the walk when I came across someone who I didn't think I would see for a while. We had turned the corner, and there, standing with his back to me, Jeannine by his side, just like what happened to me, was Four.

"Fo-" I tried to scream, but my guard grabbed me and turned me back around the corner, slamming me against the wall, his hand over my mouth. I kicked and screamed into his hand, trying to get free. I had Four's attention though, I could tell. I heard a sickening crack, and Jeannine's cry.

I heard footsteps, and when I tilted my head to look, the guard's hands came off me, as he ran down the hall, but Four was faster, and grabbed his arm, pulling it behind him and up his back. The guard tried to yell, but Four threw him against the wall, and the guard slumped to the ground.

Then Four came to me. "I told you I didn't want to drag you into this." He growled, and I grinned.

"She's my friend and if it wasn't for me, you would be unconscious right now." I replied, and his eyes narrowed down at me. "Come on… she was going to stab you with a small needle, leaving you to a small in and out fainting era." I say, and he looks to the ground. I won this argument.

"Let's find Tris. Security is big in Erudite, and we can't stand here forever." He says, grabbing my arms and spinning me to undo my handcuffs. He does, and we run down the hall.

"Where is Tris in this ungodly maze?" I ask Four, and we hear footsteps, lots of them make that, behind us. Four stops, and I hear him curse under his breath.

"This way. I have no idea where she is, but I'm sure the security will." He says, and we run down another hall. "Try the doors." He says, his instructor voice getting stronger and stronger. I obey like it's initiation, and start trying the hadles on the doors on either side of the hall. This goes on for what feels like months, until the handle I try turns all the way over.

"Four!" I shout, and he turns to the door I've opened, passing me and I follow him in, closing the door behind me. I turn. The space is large, and dark. I feel along the wall for a light switch, and I can hear Four doing the same.

Eventually the lights blink on, and I turn to look at four, but I look at our surroundings, as Four is, before I get the chance to say anything. We are in a room, a decent size, a huge machine on one side of the room, cords and wires hanging limply from it, and on the other end of all the cords and wires, is Tris.

She's on a metal table, drips in her arms, wires around her head, snaking up her shirt, everywhere.

Four runs to her, and I follow. He shakes her shoulder, but she remains still, not even slightly moving. I look to the machine, in which a computer is located in the middle of it.

I tap on the screen, and it blinks to a blue screen, and one word, password. "Fuck…Fuck, fuck, FUCK!" I scream, and Four turns to me, his face a look of question, and I gesture to the machine beside me. He goes to it, and types something in.

"Four are you insane? If you get it wrong we're dead!" I shout, but I don't try to stop him, since I wouldn't be able to anyway.

Yet, when he hits enter, the screen blinks. He got it correct, and on the screen popped up several computer codes.

"You know, I would never say this, but right now I wish I was in Erudite." Four grumbled, staring at the codes with eyes that showed his desperation for a hint of what it meant, but they knew nothing.

I pushed him aside, to take a look myself. I pressed a couple buttons, and printed the code out, finding it to be six pages long. Luckily, there was a highlighter atop the metal garbage, and I gave it and the printed codes to Four.

"Look these over. If _anything_ catches your eye, highlight it." He only stared at me though. I sighed. "Candor trick. Just do it." And I shoved the papers in his lap, tuning back to the computer. I clicked out of the codes, and went to the computer's history, finding some scientific program that had been used recently. I read the program over, it included something about…I froze.

"Four, Jeannine's done it, in a way." I whispered, and he came over.

"What do you mean?"

"She somehow…built a never ending simulation." I say, looking over the files to make sure I'm correct.

"Are you sure? How do you know?" He asks, looking at the computer, worry in his eyes. "Can we get her out?"

I roll my eyes at him, even though I should be more sensitive, I am out of patience. "The only thing keeping her in the simulation is the machine. It keeps a transmitter within her, so that it never stops. Oh, and you might want to check her heartbeat…" I say, my eyes landing on a diagram, and I try to keep my voice strong but it falters to the end.

"WHY?!" Four says, anger in his voice. I had never seen so much emotion n his eyes.

"Four, the simulation can trick the brain into thinking she's dead. If she dies, gets hurt, or anything like that in the simulation, her brain will think she's hurt, and if it can convince itself that it's well, dying, it will die." I say, closing my eyes. Four looks hurt and worried.

"How do we shut it off?" He asks, and I turn to the computer.

"I'm not Divergent. I have no Erudite, Four." I say, and he purses his lips. "If you say the only thing keeping her in the simulation is the machine, then the answer should be obvious." He murmurs, and only then do I know what he plans to do, and I cannot stop him, even the dangers wont stop him.

TRIS

I wander through the forest, back to the waterfall, and past it. My body screams in protest, but I bite back the pain, since lying still on the ground won't do anything to help me either. I fall eventually, giving up. There was nothing I could do.

Then it happens, all at once. The trees start blinking out, leaving black circles in thin air. Then the ground starts melting, and I look at my hands, I'm fine, but the simulation is not. I start sinking and I collapse into it, too weak to scream. Then I hear voices. Tobias' grunts, Cristina's yells to stop. Stop what? What was Tobias doing? Why could I hear them? The ground swallowed me, and I let it, my body not caring what happened even though my mind's thoughts differed. Blackness washed over my vision and I let it, swallowing me whole. Maybe a nap would be good for me.

I woke to banging though, and when I opened my eyes, Tobias was bent over me, panting heavily. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Christina holding a door shut, her screams only a blur to me. I looking down, wires were wrapped around me in some parts, though most were shredded. I no longer had the scars from the simulation though, only deep cuts where needles and tubes had apparently been ripped from my skin. I moaned and tried to stand with the help of Tobias, but I fell when my feet touched the ground. Tobias muttered something I couldn't hear, and went to Christina, helping her hold the door closed, leaving my limp body on the floor. I tried to stand, but the look in Tobias' face begged me to just sit and wait until they had a plan and I was strong.

I didn't think the door would hold that long. I crawled across the room and leant up against the door, sandwiched inbetween both of their legs.

"Tris do you-" but knowing what he would say I cut him off. "Tobias I know what happened to me, and this is not the time for discussion. Got a plan?" I said, feeling stronger as I spoke. He was silent, before looking back down at me.

"Yes, actually, I think I do have a plan."


	8. The Plan

CHRISTINA

I for one am not a fan of Tobias' plan. It's insane, and a long shot. There's no way we'll live, let alone escape the building. We would either get burned or god knows what.

Tris goes first, and we open rip the grate off the air vent in the ceiling. Tobias hoists her up, and she enters, wiggling her body up and then she disappears. I'm next. I step onto Tobias hands and he tosses me up, and I quickly grab onto the edges of the vent, looking up to see Tris.

"Move up." I say, and she presses herself between the walls, scooting up like Santa in a chimney. I try to not laugh at our 'interesting' escape plan. I hear Tobias curse, and steel against steel. The door is almost opening.

"Tobias hurry up!" I say, but horrifyingly he places the grate back over the vent, and shouts through it, one word, _go_. I hear Tris' voice break above me. I know there is no convincing him out of this.

"Tris, get moving, he'll take care of himself." She nods her head, but only after I shoot her a "there's no chance so just obey me we just saved your ass" look. She climbs, and I follow, the muscles in my arms and legs straining, and it's an extremely long process. We hear fighting below, and Tris stops, when I look at her, her whole body is shaking.

"Tris, just go." I whisper, and she obeys, turning down one path, which I find a relief, because I no longer have to hold my body up. She pushes out a grate, and we find ourselves in a giant, tube, I cannot see the bottom, and when I turn my head, Tris is on a ladder on the wall of the pit. I scramble up after her, trying not to lose my balance.

We climb, and I lean back to see how much further we have to go. It goes on forever.

"Tris stop." I say, and she looks down at me. "I don't know how high we went up, but when Jeannine took me in we went up stairs. Then, we just went up an air vent. Do we want to keep going up? If we reach the top, it's not like we can survive jumping off the roof of the building." I finish saying, and I follow her gaze to the blackness in the bottom of the pit. She bites her lip, but then nods, and I start climbing down, and she follows.

After several minutes of climbing it gets darker, and she cries out.

"Christina I can't leave Four." I look up at her, and her face is a pained expression. "He'll die, or they'll put him in the simulation. He's divergent too." She is sobbing now, and she starts to climb back to the air vent.

"Tris stop!" I shout, but she ignores me. I mutter profanities under my breath and follow her. "He can get out on his own Tris! If he didn't he's probably still not even in the same room." I say, and she stops, pressing her head to the bar of the ladder. "Tris you're emotional, I get it. You were just hooked up to a long fear simulation. You can do this. Four will be fine." I finish, and I think I did it. She takes a step down, and whispers, "ok."

I smile at her and continue downward, but it gets blacker and blacker, slowing me, and Tris accidentally steps on my head more than once.

"Be careful." I say, and she whispers back, "ok."

That's all she says. Ok. Over and over again. Eventually my foot hits something, and I am standing next to the ladder.

"Tris it's the bottom." I say, moving to let her down. She gets down, and I feel my way to her hand, clasping it in my own. "What now?" She asks and I start feeling along the wall, trying to make a sense of where we are. Suddenly, the wall dips in under my hand, and feel my way and my hand touches something cold. A handle; it's a door. "Tris." I say, and she touches the door. I try the knob. Locked.

"Help me open it." I say and we count. "One, two THREE!" we shout kicking as hard as we can. The wooden door breaks open, and light floods into the room. I look out, seeing that Tris is covering her eyes from the sudden light. It's an alleyway. I don't think twice. I look at Tris and we run.

Around corners. We are still in Erudite, and I hear people screaming and running. I see the tracks, and we run for them, as luckily enough a train comes. We jump on, and slam the cargo door shut before they can follow us.

I breathe a sigh of relief and look up at Tris. She looks broken.

TRIS

I am speechless. Christina is giving me her Candor eyes, and I know she wants to talk. I sit with my back up against the wall, staring at the floor of the train. We left him. I couldn't believe what I had done. I know if I went back I would have probably died, but now Tobias was probably dead, and it was just another weight on my shoulders.

"Tris I'm sorry." I hear Christina say, but I do not pay any attention to her. I don't want to talk.

When we get to dauntless, I want to go to Tobias' and mine apartment, but Cristina and me are the center of attention, and I am dragged to Max's office. I tell him what happened, but halfway through I pass out. Or something, I don't know.


	9. I love you Tobias

TRIS

I wake up in my apartment, without Tobias, and Christina sits on the edge of the bed.

"Hey." She says and I roll into my pillow. "Listen Tris, they're working on what's happening. You passed out cold in the middle of Max's office and you were taken here. I finished the story for him, and now they're working on it. They know one thing for sure and they wanted me to tell you that Four's alive." She says, rubbing my leg comfortingly.

"Ok." I say, and I look away when Christina look hurt. I don't want to hurt her, I just feel bad for what we did. What I did. What she let me do.

When I didn't look back up at her, she left, without a word. Right as she was leaving I looked up at her.

"Christina! I want to talk, just not now, but I do have one question. When I…uh…jumped," Christina cringes at the word. "Do they know how they got me? I couldn't have died, but how did I live? How did they get me out of Dauntless?" I ask, and she looks to the floor.

"They think they somehow set up a net an inch under the water, hidden, but enough to save you." Christina replies, and closes the apartment door.

I sleep another hour, then get up, and dress, walking out to the chasm. I look down and lose everything in my mind, going into a peaceful daze.

CHRISTINA

After letting her sleep another hour, I went back to Tris' apartment. Her door was locked. I frowned. She got up to lock it? Was she here even?

"Tris! It's me Cristina! Open up!" but no one came to the door. I sighed and started heading for Max's office, irritated that Tris would make me open the door myself. I was lucky though that Max had extra keys of every apartment in Dauntless. As I passed through the pit I saw her though. Leaning over the railing, deep in thought.

"Hey Tris." I say, and she blinks out of her daze.

"Oh, hey." She says. I walk to her and lean against the railing. "I think I met go to see Max, find out about Four." She says, and I smile.

"Do that then. Knowing might make you feel better." I say, trying to be comforting. I've yelled at her with no patience enough already.

She smiles, and together we walk to Max's office.

When we get there, we find Max in a meeting, but when he sees us, he says something to the men in the room, and they leave, leaving us with Max.

"What can I do for you ladies?" He says, kindness in his voice but it is obvious he is tired.

"Max," I say. "We want updates on Jeannine." Max looks to the ground, and then goes to his desk.

"Four is alive. That we do know. He's divergent, and I don't think they would kill him. If they're running Jeannine's tests on him or not I do not know." He says, and Tris squeezes my hand. Max continues. "She is not as powerful as last time, she has nothing huge planned, only the machine that Tris was hooked up to, and there is no doubt she's trying to make a transportable version of it, one where the victim is not constantly attached to it." He finishes, and before I can say anything, Tris asks a question.

"What do you plan to do?" The words come flying out of her mouth like she had been preparing them for hours. Max looks at her and then back down at his desk.

"As I said, it's not as big. She should be easy to take out. We're going to send one-hundred soldiers after her tomorrow night. No, you cannot get involved. The other factions agree to this, and Jeannine will not have a trial. She will be executed in the attack."

I look at Tris, she is no longer clenching my hand. Her arms are crossed over her chest and she is looking at the floor, tapping her foot, and her lips are pursed. She couldn't show her unhappiness more than right now. She was pissed.

"Max do you expect me to stay here and wait for a bunch of people to bring back my boyfriend from hell?" She asks, and I inwardly groan. This conversation will _not_ be very pretty.

"Yes I do Beatrice, and if you try don't stay willingly I will force you to stay here." He says, and I can see she is taken aback. He said her real name. Shit. This will not go well.

"It's Tris." And she continues, speaking louder so that Max can't cut her off. "And how do you think you'll keep me here?" She says, and Max sighs, picking up a walkie talkie, and muttering words into it that I cannot hear.

"Tris I think you should go now. I have things to attend to. I'll get you when Four comes back." And before I can scream a warning at Tris, Zeke comes up behind her and shoots her with a dart gun in the back of the neck. She screams, but falls, and in seconds, passes out.

I look down at her, then to Zeke, who is bending down to pick her up. "Sorry Tris." Is all he says before scooping her into his arms. I am both speechless and completely ticked off.

"Take her to her apartment and watch the door." Max says, ushering us out of his office. "I'm busy."

I shoot Zeke a glare, and he simply shrugs. "I have a job and I don't want to get fired." He says, and I stick my tongue out at him before walking off to my apartment. Zeke was an asshole.

TRIS

I woke up in my apartment, and even though the drug I had been given was making me groggy, I shot out of bed and to the door. It was unlocked, but someone or something was holding it closed.

"OPEN THE DOOR!" I shouted, and I heard Zeke laughing. "No can do. They got back, you've been out for the whole day, and Four's in the infirmary. Sorry, Tris visitation hours are closed."

Only then do I look to the clock on the bedside table. It's three in the morning. I groan.

"Zeke you bastard. If I did just sleep for a day and a half how do I go back to sleep?" I ask, and he responds immediately, ready with an answer to every question.

"You don't sleep. When visiting hours open and Four gets out of surgery you can come out." I scream and bang on the door furiously. Four was in surgery? How badly was he injured? How could they make me sit here while he's half dead? I heave a sigh and sit on my bed, tears asking to leave my eyes, and I let them. I don't care. I hear Zeke talking to someone, and then the door opens, and Christina comes in.

"You better thank me. He's out of surgery, and just woke up. He's threatening the nurses that he'll rip the bandages off his skin if he doesn't see you. I bribed Max to let me get you." I smile and run past her, and she follows me, to the infirmary.

Christina leads me through the Infirmary, turning hallways this way and that until she stops at a door. I don't hesitate, and burst through the door. Tobias is lying on the bed, bruises everywhere, bandages and casts wrapping him like a mummy. He is yelling at the nurse and she look pissed when I come in.

He turns to look at the door and when he sees me, a smile spreads across his face. I breathe a sigh of relief and run to him, crashing my lips against his. He plays his fingers into my hair, and deepens the kiss.

I back off, and turn to see Christina smiling her head off. I roll my eyes, and she leaves, muttering something about PDA.

"What happened?" I ask, and he looks down. I frown. "Tobias?" but then he looks up at me.

"Not sure. I was unconscious most of the time. She never put me in a simulation though surprisingly. When you left the door burst, and they toppled me down. I don't know how many people there were, only that I went unconscious almost immediately. Then I woke up in the infirmary, only to be drugged to sleep before I could even react." He finishes, and he looks unhappy. Last time I checked, he doesn't like being unconscious.

"Are you going to be alright?" I ask hopefully, and he smiles.

"Fine. Just a bunch of casts, but they work, as long as I see that smile." He says, and I laugh, kissing him again.

That's what we do for the rest of the day, from three in the morning to five at night, when Christina dragged me out. He was alive, and I was the happiest person in the world. I even agreed to go shopping with Christina, which it took a lot for me to do.

Jeannine was dead, and in celebration, Uriah and Zeke threw a party in the pit, under Max's special permission. Sure, Tobias had to wear the many casts to the party, disabling dancing, and I forbid him to drink, but we still had a blast, and I would love him forever.


End file.
